There’s nothing more meaningful than a working relationship between two people that encourages, optimizes growth, joyfully inspires and exemplifies the true meaning of love. Ultimately, this is what we strive for; however, there are personal obstacles to overcome to achieve this level of cohesion. We will discuss these obstacles in subsequent paragraphs.
When two people entered into a relationship, there should be a shared responsibility. For example: a teacher and a student have a shared responsibility. The teacher’s responsibility to the student is to be aware if the student is falling behind. A good teacher will treat all of her students equally. She will give equal attention to her students without favoring as much as possible. The student’s responsibility to the teacher is to communicate when things aren’t going well, and to pay attention to what the teacher is teaching. Both parties are responsible for each other as to complete a goal together.
Since a working relationship is equal for the most part, then both parties are responsible for the relationship. Both are responsible and share in the faults, successes, challenges, and opportunities within the relationship. To reiterate, a working relationship takes two. Separately, you are responsible for yourself.
If a student feels unhappy within the student/teacher relationship, it would be his responsibility to communicate his concerns. The teacher on the other hand, has the responsibility to the student to feel and foresee any hidden potential problems he may foresee, as much as possible of course. The key word here is “feeling.”
As in a marriage or love relationship the same applies. Both people involved have a responsibility to each other. Not to be co-dependent, and not compromising oneself, but being conscientious and communicating your feelings so to maintain and improve the relationship. The idea here is to improve and add to what’s already there or was.
Communicating with your partner consist of vocalizing your concerns in a peaceful manner, and expressing gratitude when warranted. Basically, we are recognizing and respecting our partner as if they were one with us. As if we were talking to, or about ourselves.
Now let’s begin with the most important relationship you will ever have. If you can master this relationship, then you won’t have to question why people do the things they do. You would know why, because you will know yourself.
This is the relationship you have with yourself. Do you respect yourself? Do you communicate your feelings? Meaning, do you listen to yourself when things don’t feel good? Are you compromising yourself by staying in a place or situation because of someone else’s belief? If you answer yes to any of these questions then you have a dysfunctional relationship with yourself.
By becoming aware of how you treat yourself, you will become more aware of how you treat others. We all have something to offer, however, we can improve our acceptance of others if we improve our acceptance of ourselves. It’s true, we can be nice to our friends while mistreating ourselves and family. These are people in pain, and they are not feeling deserving of themselves, for whatever reason.
The overcoming of obstacles I spoke of above is not external. This is all about you; you need to overcome yourself first. It’s not an easy task, and it can take much work, but the idea here, is now you know where to start.
Conventional wisdom and old psychology focused too much on who did what to you and why. That’s fine if you want to go about it the hard way, but this system is like working backwards.
You do have a choice, you can decide if you want to be in this situation you’re in, or change the way you’re acting towards others. It may not be an easy choice, but it has to be your choice.
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